MandoPop and I

I have posted before about how I got to know Kpop, this time here I want to share about the thing that I have fancy long before Kpop. That is MandoPop.

Actually I couldn't really call it MandoPop as it is not started with pop songs. I started fancy Mandarin songs after Huan Zhu Ge Ge drama released in 1998 or 1999 when it was on TV in Indonesia, and most of its songs are quite Chinese classics.

I love Chinese classic songs. Like the one in Mei Hua Lao and Xin Yue Ge Ge but sadly in Indonesia TV they used dubbed version instead of subbed ones, the soundtracks changed into Indonesian version even though used the same arrangement and same meaning of lyric, but in the drama you can hear the original soundtrack played here and there faintly.

Mei Hua Lao (1993) - Xin Yue Ge Ge (1994) - Huan Zhu Ge Ge (1998)

Even until now I still singing Meng Li

To say I'm a MandoPop fan, I think it's unfair to the real MandoPop fans, so I must say I just fancy Mandarin song especially the ones that were used as soundtracks to dramas I love.

So, instead of listing out my favorite group and singer, I will list out my favorite Original Soundtracks in Mandarin.

#1 The Outsiders 

Love all the songs! Really. All the songs fit perfectly into the drama, every character got their own songs and each of the songs portray the feelings really well. I'll say all the songs in this original soundtrack album are awesome I can't tell which one is better than the others, all of them are perfect. I love it!

#2    At the Dolphin Bay

The drama itself is already quite musical with the main female character being a singer. Journey, 遺失的美好 (Lost Happiness), and I Don't Wanna Know will forever be in my heart.

#3    100% Senorita

Everyone who watched this drama would definitely remember the song Disguise by Lene Marlin. This drama used quite a few of English and Japanese songs, besides Disguise, there is also That Girl by Stephanie Kirkham and Autumn Leaves by Nat King Cole, the using of the piano instrumental Hana's Eyes by Croatian Pianist Maksim Mrvica in sad scenes really throw the irony the characters were facing into my heart.

#4    Mars


Another drama about the tragedy in the main characters pasts.
零 (zero) by Alan Kuo is my chosen one, not only it's the opening theme song, but the song itself taught me that we can always reset our life, leave the past and start from zero not stay in the 'zero zone', facing the new tomorrow, to the new world. The second song I really like is 白色恋曲 / White Concerto by RaRa.

#5    MVP Lovers

I've talked about MVP Lovers / MVP Valentine's soundtrack having some Korean songs that makes me like Kpop back then. But what are the original 'original' soundtrack from the soundtrack album that I like other than the Korean songs? First, I must tell you that aside of having Korean songs, this drama also had Japanese songs, and most of the Mandarin songs in this drama were performed by 5566, and all of their songs are great. 無所謂 (Doesn't Matter), 我難過 (I'm Sad), and 挑撥 (Instigation) are my favorites.

#6    The Outsiders 2

The sequel of The Outsiders drama have no less awesome soundtracks than the first season. Let me say 你說 (Say It) is my favorite, 張勛傑 (Because It’s You), and 灰色空间  (Gray Space) are my favorites.

#7    Westside Story 


Westside Story was starred by 5566 as a group so of course they participated in the soundtrack too, and their song
存在 (Existence) and 傳說 (Legend) both made it as opening and closing theme song. But my favorite is the duet of Cindy Wang and Tony Sun - 煎熬 (Tormented). 

 

Other than those songs I've mentioned above, I'd like to put some honorable mention down here for my other favorite Mandarin songs that the album didn't make on my list up there.

  • Angela Zhang - 不想懂得 (Don't Wanna Understand)

    • This song was from Romantic Princess drama, I don't really like the drama, or fancy the other songs in the drama, but this one song really caught my attention, the lyric is deep.

  • 5566 - Without Your Love

    • It's not an official soundtrack, but the Music Video for this song was specialized to show the love 'Prince' had Xiao Xi, both are characters from MVP Lover but since Prince wasn't the main character and Xiao Xi ends up with her true love Chen Feng, fans wanted to see what happen to Prince after the drama, and this song portray the tragic story of Prince.

  • Toro - 忘了愛 (Forgetting Love)

    • I honestly don't like this drama, the cast, the music, the story, but I heard this song, and I just love it.

  • Harlem Yu - 情非得已 (Last Resort)

    • The first Hana Yori Dango manga live action, Meteor Garden, even though it originated from Japan, but everyone knows when we talk about F4, it means the Taiwanese F4, and if it's not all, most of the teenagers of 2000s era knows this song to heart. It's obviously not F4's song, but when you started "Nányǐ wàngjì chūcì jiàn nǐ.. yī shuāng mírén de yǎnjīng..", we know what we're singing about (pun intended).

  • Penny Tai - 你要的愛 (The Love You Want) 

    • If I mentioned Meteor Garden's OST, I shall not skipped "Wǒ míngbái.. Wǒ yào de ài.."

  • F4 - 流星雨 (Meteor Rain)

    • It's not from Meteor Garden but it is an F4's song, and people used to relate this Meteor Rain with Meteor Garden which has no connection at all. But this song is great, used to be my midi ringtone on my Nokia back in 2003.

  • Sammi Cheng - 快樂不快樂 (Happy Not Happy)

    • It's from a romantic comedy movie Summer Holiday, this was a song Sammi Cheng was singing in a Karaoke while crying because her boyfriend cheated with her best friend. It was a sad song, but was a funny scene.

Alright, so that's all for now. I don't know if there will be another post about Mandarin songs later. Might post some lyrics with translation though.

 

Until the next post~

[Lyric] Sistar Hyorin - 널 사랑하겠어 (I Chose to Love You)

 널 사랑하겠어 (I Chose to Love You)

Lyric and Produce by 김창기
Performed by SISTAR Hyorin
Original Sountrack of How to Love Smart 2
Released 2012  
 
 

[한글]

내 뜨거운 입술이 너의 부드러운 입술에 닿길 원해
내 사랑이 너의 가슴에 전해지도록..
아직도 나의 마음을 모르고 있었다면은
이 세상 그 누구보다 널 사랑하겠어

널 사랑하겠어 언제까지나
널 사랑하겠어 지금 이 순간처럼
이 세상 그 누구보다 널 사랑하겠어

어려운 얘기로 너의 호기심을 자극할 수도 있어
그 흔한 유희로 이 밤을 보낼 수도 있어
하지만 나의 마음을 이제는 알아줬으면 해
이 세상 그 누구보다 널 사랑하겠어

널 사랑하겠어 언제까지나
널 사랑하겠어 지금 이 순간처럼
이 세상 그 누구보다 널 사랑하겠어

널 사랑하겠어

널 사랑하겠어 언제까지나
널 사랑하겠어 지금 이 순간처럼
이 세상 그 누구보다 널 사랑하겠어

널 사랑하겠어 언제까지나
널 사랑하겠어 지금 이 순간처럼
이 세상 그 누구보다 널 사랑하겠어

널 사랑하겠어 언제까지나
널 사랑하겠어 지금 이 순간처럼
이 세상 그 누구보다 널 사랑하겠어

 
 

[Romanized]

Nae tteugeoun ipsuri neoui budeureoun ipsure dakil wonhae
Nae sarangi neoui gaseume jeonhaejidorok..
Ajikdo naui maeumeul moreugo isseotdamyeoneun
I sesang geu nuguboda neol saranghagesseo

Neol saranghagesseo eonjekkajina
Neol saranghagesseo jigeum i sungancheoreom
I sesang geu nuguboda neol saranghagesseo

Eoryeoun yaegiro neoui hogisimeul jageukhal sudo isseo
Geu heunhan yuhuiro i bameul bonael sudo isseo
Hajiman naui maeumeul ijeneun arajwosseumyeon hae
I sesang geu nuguboda neol saranghagesseo

Neol saranghagesseo eonjekkajina
Neol saranghagesseo jigeum i sungancheoreom
I sesang geu nuguboda neol saranghagesseo

Neol saranghagesseo

Neol saranghagesseo eonjekkajina
Neol saranghagesseo jigeum i sungancheoreom
I sesang geu nuguboda neol saranghagesseo

Neol saranghagesseo eonjekkajina
Neol saranghagesseo jigeum i sungancheoreom
I sesang geu nuguboda neol saranghagesseo

Neol saranghagesseo eonjekkajina
Neol saranghagesseo jigeum i sungancheoreom
I sesang geu nuguboda neol saranghagesseo


[English Translation]

My warm lips wants to touch your soft lips
So that my love will be delivered to your heart
If you still haven't known how I felt
More than anyone in this world I chose to love you

I chose to love you until the end of time,
I chose to love you like this moment right now,
More than anyone in this world I chose to love you

I can arouse your curiosity by saying difficult words
I can spend this night with that common game
But I want you to know my heart now
More than anyone in this world I chose to love you

I chose to love you until the end of time,
I chose to love you like this moment right now,
More than anyone in this world I chose to love you

I chose to love you

I chose to love you until the end of time
I chose to love you like this moment right now,
More than anyone in this world I chose to love you

I chose to love you until the end of time
I chose to love you like this moment right now,
More than anyone in this world I chose to love you

I chose to love you until the end of time,
I chose to love you like this moment right now,
More than anyone in this world I chose to love you

The Big Break

 I'm gonna talk about the big break that happened to me in 2009. It was the big break from college, the big break from social life, normal life, the big heart break.

Life changed.

In the essay I wrote for my College Entrance, I talked about how the University would be my second home, how I would work hard. I asked myself in that essay, and I quote "Would I give up or would I be careless of my own fate? Or maybe I could pass all the obstacles with my chin up."

Truth is, I give up not because I didn't care of my own fate, or that I couldn't pass the obstacles, but I give up because that's the only thing I could do.

In 2005, my dad left hometown to the capital, followed by my brother who graduated in 2007, leaving me and my mom behind. It's not a problem, they left because they had to, and my mom and I was okay. But when my mom followed them in 2009, that's when everything changed.

At first, I was fine, I was living with my grandma, I was doing good with college, I had no problem at all, until loneliness hit me. I think it was something about my own mind, I just felt abandoned, even though I was not. When the first term in college started (second half of the year) my will to survive college gradually went down, the subjects and tasks getting harder, and I just lost inspiration for my designs. The worst of it all is the money problem.

I started getting insomnia, I could only sleep an hour or two a day. Withdrawal and changed in personality makes me feel hard to see my friends, I started getting problem on working in team, even though my friends kept trying to make me feel better, but it's just me, I'd just went home early and working in my room all day. I suffered weight loss but my family 'praised' me for successfully losing weight. I lost 10 kg from 60 kg. It's weird to be praised when it was never you intention to begin with.

I was sick mentally and physically. I lost track of myself, of what I wanted, I started to changed from the person who wants to do things, to the person who will just do whatever others do, I used to say 'let's do this' but changed to someone who would say 'if you want to do it I'll go with you'. I started walking behind my friends instead of leading, I refused to talk in the presence of others, I don't want to make new friends, and I even cut my hair out of anger.

Suicidal thought started to make its debut in my mind.

Then I stopped going to college. 

What prevented me of suicide was the thought that I would bring shame to mom, to grandma, I would make them sad, I would make the whole family talked about my parents, I would make the people around them blaming those I left. Most of all, I would not achieve anything from it. I guess it was because I never thought of myself at the first place, that's why I don't do what I wanted to do. Not even suicide.

I've never talked about this to anyone, I don't like talking about it with others face to face, I am someone who would cry when I feel unfairness, and the whole things that happened to me is so unfair that I would cry my heart out if I ever started talking about this, and I hate it when people see me cry. That's why I put it on my blog, I don't care if no one reads it, I just want it out of my heart, to let go of the burden I've kept for so many years, and no, I am not crying right now. 

If you ever had the thought of suicide, please learn from me, death is just death, you don't gain anything of it, but leaving shame to those you left behind, those you probably hate, and love.

 

Thanks for reading.